Here's looking @ you!

This post will only make sense if you're "with it", technically speaking. In particular, you facebook fiends....

Question... why do people put "@" in front of a persons name to whom they're addressing? For instance, on a Facebook post, several friends leave me a comment, and then I want to reply to one of those comments, so I begin my comment by addressing that person by name so everyone knows who I'm replying to. But I've noticed in these replies people don't just put the persons name, but feel the need to put an @ sign in front of it; like @Nate. Is that the new coolguy thing to do these days you crazy, hip kids? Cause as far as I know, you don't need an @ sign to clarify who the heck you're addressing. That's what their name is for. Which, by the way, you've already listed. I'm just sayin'...

Aaachoooooooooooooo!!!

With the swine flu fears running ramped, there have been all kinds of ways to "prevent" the spread. We have a poster with this little guy on it at work. And I've heard from all over the place the "proper" way to cough or sneeze is to use your sleeve.
Tell me, how is this MORE sanitary? Anyone been doing this? At least if I sneeze in my hands I can immediately wash them, or at the very least follow up with some hand santizer I keep on hand. But your sleeve, assuming you're wearing long enough sleeves, your nastiness stays there all day. I'll be replacing hugs with air high fives. Not to mention, if you have skinny arms like mine, the bulk of your sneeze is absorbed by the sleeve, but there are plenty of leftovers flying around my little arm that couldn't contain the wrath. So how is this more sanitary?? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills.

WTF?!

What the Freak?? I'll give you guys all a moment to digest the photo you are viewing...



Any verps??



Well, if you haven't figured it out by now, that is an ENORMOUS fat boogie on a shirt. And of course there's a story....

So I have an interview, to which I have been desperately shopping for a pant suit. I FINALLY found one at JCPenney (a light grey suit) and see the perfect shirt to go under it... yes, the one pictured here. You see, I have the WORST luck in the world when it comes to shopping for clothes. The suit was hard to find because I'm two different sizes on top and bottom and suits are mostly sold as a set. This shirt (did I mention it's the perfect shirt?), was the last one in my size. Naturally. Because that's my luck. I bring it up to a cashier to see if they maybe have another one somewhere in my size, which they didn't, and seeing the question on her face as to why I would ask, I point at the green nasty on the shirt to which she says, "Ohh...um, what is that?" She tried to sound coy but i was in no mood to beat around the bush. "Uh, I think it's a bugar." I matter-of-factly stated. So she grabbed a papertowel and the thing flicked right off in one quick brush of the papertowel, clearly indicating it's crustiness. Then she offered 10% off....So, I bought it. Yes, bugar and all. Did I mention I was desperate? don't judge me.

Dexter

Recently my husband and I were in a bakery and the young girl working as the cashier says to my husband, "anyone ever tell you look just like the guy in Dexter?"
To which he retorted," so you're saying I look like a mass murderer?"

baahaahahahahahahahahaaa

Nyquil..."for a better tomorrow"

Anyone seen the commercials for Nyquil lately? I've posted a link for your convenience. Call me crazy, but isn't that crap supposed to treat your symptoms so "you can rest better"? The guy seen here is snoring up a storm with his mouth hangin open which tells me he his nose never cleared up. Why would I pay for a product that basically doesn't deliver on symptom relief? The commercial seems to state, Nyquil: will cause you to pass out only to wake up with a severe dry mouth and a sinus headache from congestion... and if you have a spouse, don't expect to sleep since they'll be kicking you all night from your snoring.
Word on the street is if you're looking to pass out, a couple beers will land you the same zzzz's and you may even have some fun doing it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaNidmpcywk&feature=youtube_gdata

Breast feeding baby doll...

Yes you read that right. Maybe I'm a bit too conservative, but this is ridiculous! Keep in mind the link I provided is from someones personal webpage so the information provided is actually mocking the product.

http://www.thingamababy.com/baby/2009/07/babyglutton.html

I'm sorry, but this toy is kinda creepy. I mean, it makes it's own sucking sounds for heavens sake! Really?
Here's the deal folks, there isn't a single woman I know that needed a doll to "teach" them their own bodies feed babies. Are you really going to sit your 3 year old down and explain they've got options in feeding their dolly? Options they probably aren't mature enough to fully understand anyway.
The most ridiculous part of it is the tank top that has the flowers over the boobs that trigger the baby noises. That could have some interesting ramifications down the road. LOL
Anyone seen the movie Now and Then?? There's a scene where a mom explains to her young daughter the birds and the bees and how "all girls have a flower and boys have a watering hose..." and the girl grows up obsessed with gardening. bahahhahahahaa

Thoughts anyone??

Softball Losers!!

I normally don't post personal stuff on here, but I gotta vent a little. We play co-ed softball a couple nights a week, and have pretty good teams and usually make the playoffs and have won several times. On our Thursday night league, there's a particular team notorious for poor sportsmanship, in particular their pitcher. I never seen a bigger whiner/jerk in all my life. So of course we are the two teams to face off last night for 1st place. They show up with a team that is full of people we've never seen all season and they are STACKED! Meaning, they brought in some ringers in a pathetic attempt to win (picture huge guys and meaty chicks). So we asked the scorekeeper and umpire to check ID's to make sure they're all on the roster. Which of course they weren't and were forced to forfeit. HA - HA!! LOSERS!!
But that's not the point of the post. After that, they proceeded to taunt and yell explicits at our team for "chickening out", in particular the loser pitcher, who sucks anyway. BOO FREAKIN HOO LOSERS!! Really?? Cause we're just playing by the rules, not to mention that there are rules for a reason idiots. And if you were smart, you would have had them on your roster (you can actually have like 40 people on your roster for subbing, and you only play with 10). Anyway, it was pathetic and stupid. I couldn't believe how horrible they all were behaving. When Nate and I were getting in our car, the idiot pitcher, flanked by his wife and two young children, very loudly proclaimed for all to hear, "even the girls on that team are a bunch of b*tches." Really? Wow. Way to go guy. Or should I say, cool guy? Cause clearly you are a cool guy, right? Glad your kids were there to hear the way you display your excellent sportsmanship and affection for woman.

I'm glad my husband had the decency to hold his tongue and just get in the car, which took a lot of discipline after hearing some jerk pretty much just call your wife a b*tch.

Totally Inappropriate

Both this post and what it's about is, well, inappropriate. Read on if you dare, but you've already seen the picture so you might as well read on...

We went on a cruise this last week, via the Carnival cruiseline. I don't want to bore you all with all the fun details of the trip, and this blog isn't about my personal affairs anyway. So this post is regarding the picture you see here. This is a picture of what adorned each and every door (with the exception of the cabin doors where you slept). To enter where you dined, shopped, or hung out... you had to "pull" open the door with this handle. Surely the person that designed this either has a sick sense of humor, or is a total perve... or both. Wouldn't you think during the approval process someone would have questioned installing something that looks strikingly similar to male genitalia? The added "pull" to each door only makes it more inappropriate, inadvertantly I'm sure since people need to know which way to open the door so they don't look like idiots "pushing" instead of "pulling". Reality is though, anyone opening a door ends up looking silly anyway by "handling" the door handle. Though it makes for a great story and a good laugh.

I kid you not, one night, one small room was closed off with a sign sitting right in front of the door handles that read, "Closed for a Private Party". bahahahahaahahaa... Really?? LOL Too bad I didn't have my camera on hand.

Those are some hands!

As I was watching the news this morning, a story came on about a blind lady that got assaulted and robbed in her home. There are truly horrible people out there and this post is not an attempt to make light of what happened, but I can't help but find humor in things that go on around me. Here is what I found somewhat amusing about the brief broadcast. Right after the statement of what happened to this poor woman, they proceeded to give a very detailed description of the man who assaulted her, with no mention of other witnesses. Granted there could have been other people around, but then why wouldn't they have done something? So how did they get a description of the man? Since she's blind, I'm guessing this lady must have some hands with ridonkulous super powers to pick up on the fact this guy was white, about 5'7", with brown hair, and blue eyes.

Angry Tears

This post is mostly going to be something only girls can relate to. Why is that when we get really angry, we suddenly have that overwhelming urge to cry? When I'm angry, it sure would be nice to have some dang lasers comin' out my eyes instead of stupid angry tears. Is that too much to ask Lord? How are people supposed to take me seriously when I've got tears and no lasers?

Being a girl is lame sometimes. boo hoo.

Office Rules

I've created a few items that I think should be standardized rules in the work place since apparently common courtesy has lost its place in the world.
1. No reheating sea food in the lunch room. I don't know what it is about reheated seafood, but it somehow always seems to have that nasty fishy smell that may not have been apparent when the dish was freshly made. I'll admit I'm not a seafood enthusiast. In fact, I down right hate it. But you enthusiast can't tell me that when you walk into the lunch room, or even within a 50 foot radius, that you take a whiff of that crap and think, "mmm, that smells good."
2. NO PHONE CALLS IN THE BATHROOM. Really? Really. That phone call just couldn't wait 5 minutes? Everyone has to of experienced this at some point in a public bathroom. But at work? Really? Because it's not some stranger in that stall next to you. I mean, maybe you have little business to do there, but that coworker next to you could blast any minute for all you know! And lets not even discuss sanitary concerns...
3. Hand washing mandatory after bathroom use. What is wrong with people? You're in a public place for heavens sake. Do you not see the risk here? Maybe you're not concerned about contracting contaminants, but the rest of us have noticed your lack of washing and are concerned about receiving YOUR contaminants. And don't even try to sell me on your hand sanitizer. It doesn't replace hand washing, and kills "most" germs, not all, and does nothing to eliminate viruses.
4. Coffee pot culprit - You know who you are! The audacity! To think that some people apparently feel it's beneath them to take 2 minutes to refill the coffee pot and push the brew button after taking the rest of the last pot. Though I'm not a coffee drinker, I've seen my share of victims, and let me tell you, it can be a scary thing to witness when someone hasn't had their cup of joe in the morning and goes to pour a tall mug of nothing.
5. All or Nothing rule. If you're not going to eat the whole thing, say a donut or bagel, DON'T TOUCH IT! Not only does it concern me who may have touched that item to cut it in half, but now I'm disappointed I can't eat the whole thing. So if you're "watching" you're calorie intake, maybe you should just leave the good food for people who appreciate it.
6. No nail clipping. Yes nail clipping, as in finger nail clipping. I can understand a quick clip of a hangnail, but when I hear that "click..click...click..click..." it kinda grosses me out. All I gotta say is how nasty would that be to see someone's nail fling over onto your desk! Nasty! Cause you know when you clip those things it's like the clipper turns into a sprinkler head spraying out nails everywhere.

So maybe I should get a petition going or something... thoughts?

Diaper Changing - a pain or a privilege?

I've got about 13 nieces and nephews and between them all have had my fair share of diaper changing. So I'd say I'm in a position to share my opinion on the subject and state they are not only a pain to change, but a whole lot of nastiness. But something occurred yesterday that led me to believe that there are those who apparently consider it a privilege. Right now you're probably thinking, who in their right mind? This person must be either nuts, or maybe a new parent still relishing all the "new" little moments with their new bundle of joy. On the contrary though. This new found "privilege" (a term I use loosely since I don't necessarily agree) was actually bestowed upon me the other day by the very person whose diaper I was suddenly changing.

You see, my niece Emma (who will be 2 next month) has for whatever reason taken a strong liking to me. I don't see her too often so I'm sort of at a loss for where her attachment comes from. I'm thinking it may be very strongly linked to the piggy back rides. Anyway, my sister and I are sitting in the living room when she tells her mommy she's got "poo poo", which translates as needing a diaper change. So my sister grabs a diaper and wipes and Emma sits down in front of me. My sister drags her over, lays her down and she fusses and squirms while calling out," MB.. MB..", which is what she calls me. So my sister lets go and Emma squirms her way over till she's in front of me and throws her legs up with this huge SMILE on her face. It was as if she were saying, "Congratulations! Moms been stripped of her privileges and I have offered you this once in a lifetime opportunity. Isn't it exciting?" So of course I changed her diaper. Not to mention her mommy was all too willing to relinquish her diaper changing honor. Luckily it didn't end up being a poopy diaper.

So to summarize, most of us consider diaper changing a pain. But it the eyes of a 2 year old, it's apparently a privilege.

How Rude!!!

Picture this and ask yourself "what would I do?":
Lets say you're at El Pollo Loco. Your hubs is in line while you snag a table. There's one guy in front of you and about 4 people behind you, and one cashier ringing up. Now the guy "ordering" apparently doesn't speak or read English and is currently having the cashier give him a run down of the menu and all the different options, literally. You know this because you're husband, who is somewhat patiently waiting in line, speaks Spanish. It's been somewhere between 5-10 minutes, which is a freakin loooong ace time to be at the freakin register (hey I never claimed to be patient when I'm hungry). Anyway, that's not even the point of the story and is really a story of its own..
There's another employee, who appears to be the one taking drive-thru orders since she has a headset on, and is near an unused register. All of a sudden there's this little 8 year old girl with a $10 bill walking up to this employee to order something extra for her huge family that is sitting nearby with a table full of food and the mother standing somewhat nearby shoooing her to the register telling her in Spanish, "it's okay, just ask the lady." And the lady RINGS HER UP!!!
Hold the phones people, did that just really happen? A women had her child cut in front of 5 people and thinks that's okay? What kind of message are you sending your child? Not to mention... HOW RUDE!!!!!!!!!!
And what about the employee? I think I would have pointed that little girl in the direction of the end of the line. Does that employee not see how that might upset some of the other customers? Granted, my somewhat patient/impatient husband used that opportunity to insist that same employee ring him up since she rang up that little girl and "menu" guy was still "ordering" so I guess it was kind of a blessing in disguise.

Who'da thunk it?

I was watching one of those "do it yourself" shows and was schooled in the technique of tightening bolts. This older gentleman was showing another gentleman on how to piece together an electric handsaw. When he was tightening the bolt that held the blade in place he warned, "now don't tighten it too tight". And the other guy naturally inquired, "what would happen if I did?". I'm thinking, well geeze, the blade won't work idiot. But alas, that was not the case and this man was surely full of much more wisdom than I ever could have thought imaginable.
His reply, "well, you see, the problem is it would be too hard to get off." Huh. I honestly didn't see that one coming. Especially since there wasn't even a hint of sarcasm, which would have made the comment very funny. But he appeared to be very serious about it leaving me with the thought... Really?

We're like This!

You know the phrase. It's usually accompanied by the hand gesture of crossing the first and middle finger. I'm sure we've all used it at one time or another. But has anyone ever pondered the gesture itself? I'll admit my mind occasionally drifts in the gutter, but honestly, you gotta admit the gesture is kind of amusing when you think of it the wrong way. hehe

Wouldn't it make more sense just to hold those two fingers up close together, side by side?

I'm just sayin'....

What are you here for?

Ever seen the Blue Collar Comedy tour? Well if you have, you're familiar with the phrase, "Here's your sign!" Seriously I think I have at least a few of those kind of moments every day. But this one was blog worthy.

Me and the hubs are in the process of mattress shopping. So we went to Sit-n-Sleep, a mattress store, naturally. We walk in and are greeted by the sales guy whose first words, very cheerfully I might add, following his greeting is, "So, what are you here for?". Without missing a beat my husband says, "We're looking to buy a new car." bahahahahhahaaaaaaa
HERE'S YOUR SIGN!

I realize the salesman's question was probably more geared toward "what type of mattress are you looking for", but it doesn't take away from how dumb he sounded. haha

ACCESS DENIED!

Not sure if all of you in the work place have experienced internet blocks for websites deemed inappropriate, but my work does. The way it works is if you type in key words, like porn or boobs, a screen will pop up and indicate: ACCESS DENIED!
And then it indicates the catergory it falls under, like Pornography.
So I'm on my way to work and a rock hits my freakin windshield. I'm barely going 35 and so is the vehicle in front of me which apparently kicks up a rock that put a bulls eye the size of a penny on my winshield. So right after I crapped my pants (because the impact was so shockingly loud I jumped), I say to myself, "great, now I gotta have it repaired before it spreads." I get to work and google "windshield crack repair". To my dismay, up pops "ACCESS DENIED!"... categorized under Illegal Drugs. Huh. Really?
Maybe it's protocol to just set these internet barriers to a list of words associated with bad things, which is probably the case. But it begs the question, why? Are there really people stupid enough to look up things at work that could implicate them in illegal situations that would result in arrest? Apparently so. So FYI... be leary about the person sitting next to you at work. They could be a drug dealer.

Ohhh, she said LIKE! Well that clears it all up.

So I'm sitting in Young Womens class at church (a sunday school type class for girls ages 12-18) and we asked them about their 4th of July celebrations. We have sisters in there that don't always see eye to eye, one is 13 the other 17. The 13 year old says, "we stayed up till like midnight doing fireworks." And then her sister smugly/accusingly corrected her, "no, you guys went to bed at 11:30." And then the 13 year old very seriously/smugly corrected her... " I said like! (emphasis on LIKE with a very much "duh" tone in her voice)." It was your average sibling bickering, but I found it hysterical. And also found it enlightening. To think that I've been understanding conversations wrong all this time. Wonder how well that would go over with my boss...
"MB, I thought you said these numbers were good to go."
"I said they were like good to go." Duh.

Crazzy's Wasewagan

So this last week I spent up in Big Bear at girls camp as a "cabin mom" (although all my girls thought I was a Laurel (the 17-18 year olds) :). We went to a campground named "Crazzy's Wasewagan". The camp was built in the 30's and though much of it has been restored, it still had some spooky looking parts. Like this little shack, maybe about the size of a king size mattress in square footage, and just tall enough for me to stand up in. The whole top half was open and lined with screen material and had tattered green material hanging around the inside as make-shift drapes. The door had no knob, just a latch with a stick through it to keep it closed. (I would have taken a pic if my camera battery wasn't dead :P) And then behind the mess hall, there was a peculiar looking concrete mound with a door on it high enough for people to walk in. I'm guessing it was some sort of storage room, but looked eerily similar to the huge hearth in Hansel and Gretel that the witch cooked the kids in. So naturally my head started flowing with scary stories and between me and my friend Erin (another cabin mom), the story got pretty out of control quick, to our delight. I mean with things like described, the story practically writes itself. I had the 13 year olds in my cabin, and Erin had the 12 year olds in hers. She managed to tell the story the first night, and then it spread through camp the next day. I tried to tell it to my girls the next night, but every time I tried, they would scream NOOO, and would start singing "I am a Child of God." LOL...hysterical. Why so scared? Well let me tell you the story of the crazy bum named Lazy Eye Jenkins that used to roam these parts not so long ago...

(stay tuned for the story....)

Maturity Leave?

I've heard of military leave, maternity leave, personal leave...but maturity leave? That's a new one. The thought came from an email at work where the author of the email was inquiring about someones maternity leave, but spelled it wrong, giving the impression this individual is on a maturity leave. LOL... I can think of a few people off the top of my head that would benefit from such a leave....
hahaha

Perves Pardise

So I had the opportunity to spend a girls day out at Glen Ivy in Corona yesterday. While the day was full of fun and relaxation and some much needed girl time, I couldn't help but notice the number of men there. Granted the ratio of men there was probably less than 10%, but still that's kind of a lot for a place I'd consider "girly". Seriously, at one point there I am with my sister-n-law and mother-n-law sitting in the mineral spa when 6 gangley men invade the very same spa. Than came an involuntary and awkard conversation my sister-n-law had with one of the men where he asked about her unpainted fingernails and stated that all women should have them painted and then asked about her toes. As if that wasn't icky enough, he then kinda tapped her leg (mind you we're in swimsuits) and said, "don't worry, I won't bite." Needless to say we moved onto a different area.
I realize it's open to both genders, but I was really surprised to see so many flock to a place that most men I know see as a pointless place to hang out. So I asked myself, why? Why would these men pay 40 bucks to hang out at a pool all day. Yes we're in a day in age when the metro sexual man has...come out of the closet (or what have you), but these are NOT metro sexual men. They're frumpy old farts! And then it hit me all at once...it's a Perves Paradise.
Let's put it in perspective...
1) These days, seeing a man at a spa all day no longer labels him as gay thanks to the metro sexual man.
2) There's TONS OF PRACTICALLY NAKED WOMEN ALL AROUND AND BARELY ANY MEN.
3) Too many men at more public places that are free, like the beach.
4) Where else can a man go to casually oogle all day? And if called out on it his rebuttle would be something like, "well I don't know about you, but I paid $40 to relax. Why would I pay $40 to oogle when I can oogle anywhere else for free?" Please see point 2 and 3 sir. Not to mention, sir, many of your kind pay who knows what to get a girl to dance in your lap. Couldn't you also get that somewhere else for free?

Anyway, it sure would be nice if a place like that limited men to just a couple days a week so women can plan their spa days around those days. I went to relax, and did so, but still couldn't help but feel self conscious because of those men there. And they were oogling...

Really?

Why is that when you're trying to tell a story and then mention someone that's "older" than you, some people have to ask, "well what's older?" with a bit of a scoff in their voice. Like they're trying to be sarcastic, but there's that subtle hint of them being offended. Like heaven forbid someone is older than me.
Next time someone older than me tells a story about someone being "younger" than they are, I'll be sure to scoff in a sarcastic, but slightly offended manner. Wonder what kind of reaction I would get...

Are you Cold? Nope.

Like many women, I'm chronically cold. I could be in bed, have 5 blankets piled high, begging my husband to roll over to help me get warm. To which he rolls over, only to roll back complaining that I'm a furnace...to which I reply, "well then my bones must still be cold cause I'm freezing!"

Even as I type this my fingers are frozen from the freakin AC that blows nonstop in my cubicle. Yeah, it's like 80 out today, beautiful and sunny. But I'm indoors sitting in the Artic Circle. So my usual work attire consists of sweaters, jackets, and mittens with finger cut outs (so I can still type but keep these phalanges warm!).

So why is it that people will ask me if I'm cold?? I mean, I realize I'm wearing a jacket, but are my lips purple and my teeth chattering...? My usual reply to them is a simple, "no." And then they look at me like I'm the crazy one. I have a jacket on people.
Last I checked, jacket = warm, not cold.
I'm just sayin..

In case you missed this on my Facebook...

I just had to post this here too! It's too funny to not share with everyone.


Holy histerical! If you need a little "pick me up" and a good laugh, check out this link. It's a wolf t-shirt being sold on Amazon. It was in Yahoo news as somehow being one of their top selling items. The link below takes you directly to the comments people have left and I DIED of laughter. Granted I'm sure most are not truly genuine comments, but they are HILARIOUS! Make sure you look at pics of the shirt first!

http://www.amazon.com/Three-T-Shirt-Available-Various-Sizes/product-reviews/B000NZW3IY/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

Going back Public

So, I've decided to take this puppy back public. Why deny the world the goodness of all things Ridonkulous? I've taken some of the personal aspects out, like pictures and posts about family stuff and just keeping the blog for amusement purposes. So feel free to pass it along to your friends for an occasional laugh.

Milk and Cookies

Milk and Cookies..mmmm... you know what I'm talking about. They just compliment each other so well. I can't think of two things that go together better. So last week I realized two things: 1) I can't stand it when someone else dips their cookies in MY milk, and 2) I coined a new phrase.

One day last week I had some of my in-laws over. So I made super delicious cake batter cookies, which were quite the crowd pleaser I might add. Now before I continue, two things you should know about me...1) I don't share milk from my cup. I can share any other beverage in a cup, but for whatever reason, milk is a no-go for me. Don't know why. 2) I'm not a cookie dipper. I like to eat my cookie and chase it with milk. I don't like the cookie messing up the milk with all it's nernies and how it makes the milk taste like cookie.

Moving on. So I've got everyone's cookies served and finally sit to enjoy their deliciousness with a glass of milk. As I'm eating, out of nowhere comes Nate (the hubs) with a drive-by dip into MY MILK!! WTFreak??? Whoooaaa buddy... where do you get off thinking that was remotely a good idea?? I mean, I know we never had an official sit down to discuss cookie eating ettiquette, but really? Who does that? Freakin Nate. You get a free pass this time pal, but next time there will be forks flying!

So the positive I took from this experience is a new phrase I coined (or at least I've never heard it before). Anytime you need someone to mind their own business or whatever, but can't find the words, feel free to say... "don't go dippin' your cookies in my milk!"

But you gotta use it with a little bit of a ghetto accent to really get your point across.

El Pollo Loco - crazy chicken or just crazy?

A friend of mine and I decided to dine at the local El Pollo Loco last Friday in an attempt at a healthy alternative for food. Not remotely a preferred place of mine to dine, but Subway was getting old.

So I ordered the skinless chicken breast meal as seen in my receipt I posted here. Now as your peruse the receipt, did you happen to notice the customer name toward the bottom? To think I've been spelling my name wrong all these years. No wonder I had to repeat my name three times for her to hammer it out.

Then my meal came. Now, I don't claim to be ridiculously smart, but I would have thought purchasing a skinless chicken breast implied there would be no skin. I guess I was out smarted again by the employees of El Pollo Loco. So I was left to pick off that nastiness myself. Nasty.

And then the mother of all nastiness. As I'm finishing up my meal, something caught my eye just to the left of my friends shoulder who was sitting in front of a window. Perched on the window sill was a very dead monster size furry moth. We're talking inches away from my friend, on the inside of the restaurants window sill. It was DISGUSTING!! Thank goodness I was already pretty much done with my food cause that right there would have done me in. I think I just vurped.

Hit it!!

I'm sure most of us have heard the phrase "hit it", right? So I'm not going to bother explaining it. But funny story to share of course.
So my soon to be sis-n-law Jen was thrown a bridal shower by my mother-n-law Tracy Saturday. One of Jen's friends brought over these cute paper flowers in a vase that everyone needed to write some advice on for the bride. After the shower, I offered to drive some of her new things over to her apartment down the street and Tracy rode with me. She was holding the vase of advice flowers and started reading them as I drove. Most of them had all the crap you'd expect...don't go to bed angry, pray together, be patient...blah blah blah. And then she read, "Hit It!". To which she said, "Hit it? That doesn't even make sense."
I about DIED all while suppressing the urge to burst out laughing. I wasn't about to school my mother-n-law in slang 101.

American Idol

About a year ago I signed up on a waiting list to attend a taping for American Idol. So finally Friday I got an email for a taping for this week. But I didn't check my email this weekend, so I got the email this morning, clicked on the link to get my vouchers....AND IT WAS ALREADY BOOKED UP!!! Lame. Here's the "please note" section of the email they sent:

PLEASE NOTE: All vouchers are free. Due to the immense popularity of the show, there is a system in place to ensure that as many fans as possible get a fair chance to see the show. Therefore you will only have this one opportunity and then you will be removed from the waitlist. We are unable to make special accommodations. Therefore, if you click on the following link and are sent back to the waiting list because the shows are already full or if you are receiving this email and are unable to attend this date, we suggest you rejoin the wait list any time after Tuesday, March 17th so that we may contact you again as soon as possible. Thank you for your understanding.


It pretty much translates as: "We have only 100 seats to fill and emailed 5,000 people. So you better hurry up and click on the link to get your vouchers before someone else does or you won't get to go. And if you're NOT one of the lucky 100 to get a voucher, we will still be taking you off the wait list so you have to sign up again and wait another year."

What a joke.

Facebook Friend Whores

I finally caught the facebook wave. I find the site somewhat NOT user friendly, but whatever. It is a cool place to find old friends without the plethora of teenagers and all the crap associated with myspace. On to the point of this post. Now, is it just me, or is facebook just full of a bunch of friend whores? I admit, I have a horrible memory, so some of these people I'm sure I've spoken to at least once in my life. But honestly, if I gotta scrape my brain to remember who the heck you are, chances are we were never really friends. Sure I was probably nice to you and yada yada yada. But just because we went to the same school/church doesn't qualify you as a friend. Unless we hung out and have at least one memorable moment together, I'm going to say you're only an aquaintance. There, I said it. To all these people that have added me as a "friend" I ask, why? And I know the answer. Your a friend whore. To you I'm just another # on your friend list so that people might think your cooler now by how many friends you have. Or maybe that others will think you're cooler by having me as one of your "friends" on your facebook (haha).
So just the other day I ignored a friend request for the first time. Oh yes people. I can hear you all gasping now. I know, what a mean person. Who would do such a thing? So I've probably burned a bridge. Oh wait, no, there never was a bridge, he was never my freakin friend. I think we may have gone to the beach once with a group of people since he knows my husband through a mutual friend they have. And I'm almost positive I met him before that years ago when he dated my best friends older sister. And suddenly that qualifies as a friend. Well I guess I showed him! haahaha

Note to Self..

Next time I'm debating over buying something, ask the lady to put it on HOLD!!

I love little things like these jars and want to collect them, but they are quite pricey. The tiny size pictured will run you easily around $100. So I'm perusing one of many local antique stores with my hubs and inlaw folks and come across a cute little jar (similar to those pictured but the lid was not quite as ornate) for only $20!! But I was sort of on the fence because the lid wasn't very ornate and had some dents and the jar itself had a little chip in it. But really, for $20, still a steal. There was a sales lady helping me since certain items, like this one, are in a locked case. I handed it back to her to "think" about it. I kid you not, I turned down the next aisle, not even a minute passed yet, and some other lady already had it in her hands and was taking it to the register! She had to have been hovering just waiting for me to put that little jar down. She looked like a seasoned antiquer and will probably turn that jar around and sell it at a higher price. I was so annoyed!! I can't believe I got snaked like that. And everyone in my party was like, "you better get it now before someone else does". grrrrr.... It's like, okay, if I came back a week later, or even the next day, fine. I waited too long. But seriously, 1 MINUTE?? What a joke. It just wasn't meant to be.

So next time you need a moment to think a purchase over, make sure you put your crap on HOLD first! ding dangit.

BEST DAY EVER!!!

So yesterday Nate and I, and Chelsea and Brandon Stewart, sit ourselves down for sacrament. Just your average Sacrament meeting.... NOT!!! We sit down, and then Chelsea is like, I think that's Stephenie Meyers (she says as she discretely points just to the left at the girl sitting in the pew right in front of us). I'm like, no way. But Chelsea is totally sure of it and notes the 3 boys, and then I noticed her husband who I recognized from pictures online. So then Matt Plumber, sitting behind us, gets up (sacrament hadn't started just yet) and taps her on the shoulder to ask if she was Stephenie Meyers (the author of Twilight), to which she nodded in affirmation. And then Nate leans to her and says," you've got a couple of huge fans over here" (nodding toward me and Chelsea). She then quickly turns to briefly smile and give a little wave which made me and Chelsea giggle like little school girls. In fact I giggle even now as I write this. But you could tell she didn't want to be bothered. And I don't blame her, especially with her children there. And if it were me I would expect a little privacy at church. So to answer all your burning questions.... no we did not get an autograph or speak to her out of respect for her privacy and the Sabbath. But OHHHH to be sitting right behind her. What a GLORIOUS DAY!! Best day ever really!! so cool.

And how cool is it to have someone that's no doubt a millionaire now, on vacation, and still gets her family to church?? One more reason for me to admire her. Wow.

On a side note, we get tons of visitors in our ward because we're the nearest church building to Disneyland. First time we've had someone famous like that, but not completely out of the ordinary because of all the visitors our ward gets.

Flight of the Conchords

Do yourselves a favor... go to YouTube and find this group and watch their videos. There's a bunch of them performing live and they are HILARIOUS. By far my favorites are "Business Time" and "Frodo, Don't Wear the Ring". Both have an actual music video, but be warned the Business Time one appeared to have briefly shown one of them nude, but blurred out, so you may want to just look for their live performance (although the lyrics kind of vary so the actual video is funnier in my opinion). And the Frodo one is only hilarious if you've seen the LOTR movies (Lord of the Rings). Soooooo freakin funny people. Please, seriously, if you need a good laugh, you will die of laughter. And if you don't, you're dead inside.

Oh, and if you haven't seen Achmed the Terrorist, look for that on YouTube too. It's a vantrilliquist performance that is ridiculously funny.