July 30, 2008

Moment of Silence Please..

Lackey missing his throwing arm, Vlad missing both arms (and bat), Hunter missing an arm,
and Figgins... an arm, hand, leg, head cracked open and knocked off the foundation he was once positioned on.















































Now I know the news didn't broadcast any casualties from the quake. But when I came home, I found our poor Angel bobbleheads in pieces. I mean, hands and feet and crap all over the place!! It was like WWII erupted in our second bedroom. Two out of the six were practically unscathed leaving four in need of repair. I've managed to glue them all back together. Though Chone Figgins took the hardest hit and may be permanently on the disabled list. I found him missing a hand, arm, leg and half his helmet crushed in pieces. I glued most of him back together but he still has a good size hole in his helmet where the pieces were to small to glue back in.
I guess that's what happens when you live in Cali and don't secure your precious bobbleheads that sit on top of a shelf that sits on top of your desk, to where a good shake will cause them to fall and shatter on the desk.
Stay tuned for pictures...



By the way, we had lots of other things all over the place with minor broken items, but here's a weird one. We have this beautiful faux Tiffany lamp on our nightstand (with an all glass lamp shade). We came home and found it on the ground right next to the nightstand, standing perfectly up right, as though someone had just placed it there. We knew the quake knocked it down there, but it was kinda eerie seeing it so perfectly situated on the floor. Like someone was there to catch it and set it down....
But then we realized how it got to that position. Of course the quake knocked it off the stand. And the stand is about 2 feet from the wall, and next to the wall Nate had his tool bag, which is kinda like a tool box, but made out of some sturdy, but soft material. When I inspected the area, right above the tool bag there was a good size nick in the wall. So the lamp apparently tipped over off the nightstand and on it's way down hit the soft tool bag, nicked the wall, and the impact knocked it upright on the floor. Crazy! And crazy that the lampshade didn't bust at all 'cause even though the tool bag is somewhat soft, it had all kinds of tools poking out all over.
Anyway, it was cool. I should be a detective.

July 29, 2008

Before you Panic...

No doubt you felt the jolt around noon today. I read it was only 8 feet below the surface so no wonder it felt a million times bigger than 5.4 magnitude. Anyway, just thought I'd pass on some info for future reference, ya know, when the "big one" hits... or any disaster for that matter. I haven't been able to confirm this, but it makes logical sense. Many of us today after the big shake instantly turned to our cellies only to be disappointed that they didn't work. I heard that Verizon (not sure what other networks) goes "off line" for about 30 minutes following a disaster to keep lines open for 911 emergency calls since in disasters people tend to instantly jump on the phone and clog up the network which causes some calls, including emergency calls, to not get through . I would assume your cell should be able to dial 911 during that time, but no other numbers.

I think our first instinct when the phone doesn't ring out is to kinda panic and worry about that person being severely hurt and their phone is broken since it's not ringing, and all these wild ideas play out. When in reality, even if they were hurt and their phone got crushed and no longer worked, your call would still at least go straight to voicemail. So I guess, you might have reason to panic if all you get is voicemail. Ookay, I hope I didn't just cause you all to panic. You get my point.

July 24, 2008

Introducing Barbie the WHORE



Her official name: Black Canary Barbie ------- if that doesn't scream HOOKER, I don't know what does. And is it just me, or does she look a little anorexic?? Or maybe her weight is a little low from her crack addiction and all the running she does from her pimp. Apparently, this barbie is made after a popular comic book character, the Black Canary, but I don't think that makes it OK by any stretch of the imagination. And how many little girls read comic books anyway to where the toy industry would see a real opportunity here??
By the way, she is for real, and for sale for about $40 at Toys R Us.
Dang, I didn't know hookers were so cheap!

July 8, 2008

Hands Free Law

So everyone knows about the new law. Maybe this already occurred to you too...While I was watching the news July 1st, the newscaster was interviewing a police officer about the new law and asked about texting, something I was curious about as well. Turns out, there's nothing in the new law prohibiting texting, let alone a law of it's own. Call it ironic? Or hypocritical maybe? Not sure what to call it, but it sure doesn't make sense. I can't help but feel texting is a million times more dangerous to do while driving than having the dang phone in hand. At least when the phone is in my hand i still have one hand on the wheel and BOTH FREAKIN EYES ON THE ROAD. So unless you have some crazy talent that allows you to look down with one eye and the other on the road all at once, this is the dumbest law ever. Way to make the roads safer law makers. How can I repay you? How about with this hilarious video!!

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-42985#


By the way, the cop mentioned there is a law that allows cops to pull you over and write tickets for driving distracted, which he tied into people texting. Not that I'm a genius, but wouldn't that law cover the whole driving with a cell in my hand? Granted the cell phone law was probably instituted so they can fine you more for it, but that doesn't sound as funny as noting there's already a law covering it.

July 2, 2008

Meanest Person Ever..



Okay, sometimes I feel like the meanest person ever because I have these mean thoughts that I not only sometimes share with others, but I think they're funny, which is why I share them. So feel free to judge...here's the latest and greatest mean thought...

So I share an office with another employee (a one man office I might add). Among other annoyances I've maybe ranted about before (like the stupid radio), I have a new one to add to that list. And maybe you all think I'm mean for having a list, yeah, I'm not going to argue. But when you share a tiny office with someone else, you'll find your own list writing itself.

Anyway, she ALWAYS has a desk full of wintergreen lifesavers mints, a flavor I too enjoy on occasion. And she eats them all day long. So not only do I have to hear her crunching on those things all day, but it friggin smells like bengay in here, ALL DAY LONG!! I used to love wintergreen. Now... not so much.

AND THEN..... one day, I happened to have a few pieces of candy (the little bite size snickers if you must know). So as I was unwrapping my third piece, and then my coworker says,"another candy? you must be addicted to candy."

First of all, who the hell says that???? I was like, REALLY?? I'm addicted to candy?? And what the freak have you been poppin all day long stupid.






By the way, we just got out of a quick meeting with our manager who had a bottle of pepsi on her desk. My coworker, no joke, at point blank, asked, "is that a pepsi?" No, it's a friggin rocket I plan on sending into space. What the heck do you think????????? HERE'S YOUR SIGN!!!! ahahahahahahahahahahaa

(I don't want to imply that she's unintelligent or anything since for the most part I know she is intelligent. But c'mon, who says that?)

July 1, 2008

Afraid to go into the Water??

If you aren't, well, maybe after reading this...too bad there's no picture. Click on the picture below to read how big the fish was...
I guess the clicking on the pic doesn't work. Basically a 6 1/2 foot long catfish was found dead. It apparently tried to eat a soccer ball, which got stuck in the fishes mouth, eventually killing it.
To put the size of that thing in perspective, if it had legs, it would be taller than my husband.