Okay, before you read, this is in the strictest confidence because my hubs told me not to blab it to people, but sometimes things happen where the marriage confidentiality clause is completely null because I felt the public could benefit from knowing about the events that have taken place. I should also add that these offenses have never diminished my love for my husband or my perception of the wonderful man that he truly is. Here are the offenses, which actually occurred years apart from each other.
So there I am, half asleep minding my own business, when I suddenly felt something tap my face. It was big enough to wake me up and I said to my hubs, "I think something hit my face." I was a little freaked out because of bugs and spiders, etc. He was like "are you serious?" "Uh, yeah I'm serious." While trying to stiffle his laugh he says, "I just flicked a bugar." OH, MY, GOSH. I'm not quite yelling, but clearly aggitated at his admission. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????? IT'S ONE THING TO PICK YOUR NOSE AND FLICK (which I don't really care, hey I'll admit it too, I'm a nose picking flicker so whatever okay) BUT WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU FLICK IT MY WAY??" Gross.
PSA #1 - If you're gonna pick and flick, please make sure to flick in a direction opposite of anyone around you.
Next offense. I have this cute little plastic cup I like to use for my water with the disney princess's on it. Sometimes I leave it on the side table next to our couch. So anyway, I filled it up with water and after taking a few drinks I noticed some residue at the bottom of the cup that almost looked like mold. ew. "Honey, I think there's some mold in my cup." "Let me see," hubs replied. After inspecting he declared, "that's not mold." I could hear the laugh forming within him and I was like "What Is It Then?" "It's a bugar," he admitted bursting into laughter, "I didn't have anywhere else to put it." Too lazy to get up off the couch and get a tissue and evidentally just too messy or big or both to just roll and flick. He's not trying to pull pranks on me, he just doesn't think things through sometimes. He thought he'd remember to wash my cup before I had a chance to notice. He forgot, to my dismay.
PSA #2 - If you strike gold in your friggin nose, do us all a favor and get a tissue. Don't be lazy!