August 15, 2008

What a Skeezy Beast!!

First of all, I'll never understand (even if I wasn't mormon) why any girl would want to wear a skirt that seriously barely covers her butt checks due it's shortness in length. It would be annoying to be constantly conscious of keeping your goodies out of everyone's view. But then I guess those type of girls like their goodies out there for all to see. That must be it. They may as well be ringing a dinner bell with that easy access.
Case and Point: Nate and I had the luxury of having one of these skanks sitting behind us at the Angel game Wednesday, slightly to the right of Nate. One wrong turn of his head would have been fatal (due the beating that would have been initiated by me). Thank goodness he has manners.
So the skank leaves with her friend and then return a short while later. They proceed to walk down our isle, and then to my disgust, hop on the seat that's two seats over from me and climb up to their seats. And the skank was coming toward us at an angle because they were sitting on the other side of Nate, so she went all SPREAD EAGLE on us. Holy friggin CRAP!! She just put us on BLAST with her spread eagle! Thank goodness Nate was focused on the game. I was almost in shock at how blatant she was about what she did. I was like, "what kind of frickin skeezy beast does that??" Nasty whore, that's who. I was two seconds away from ramming her friggin crotch with my water bottle. Seriously, who just spreads eagle like that?? I could have killed her for putting my husband in a situation where he could have turned his head at the wrong moment, not wanting to see that any more than i did, and then she probably would have been thinking, "oh yeah baby, see what you're missing out on. You totally want me." Cause you know that skeezy beast was looking for some sort of reaction from him. I was totally peeved.
And then her and her lame friend kept trying to get people to cheer, and nobody would and the whore said, "geeze, what a bunch of boring fans."
I was really close to saying,"I guess we're all still trying to swallow the vomit in our mouths after seeing your rotten cheese from the lack of skirt you're wearing." I bit my tongue though. There were children around.

8 comments:

The Bock Family said...

You kill me....enough said.

Stewart Van Buskirk said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kristine Van Buskirk said...

I am laughing so hard!! LOL! You put a very nice picture together. I have to say, I agree with you. Too bad you couldn't say anything. I guess some of you had manners. ha ha. Great story!

That last deletion was me. I had posted as Stew. Oops.

BLACKBIRD BOUTIQ said...

bahahahah,,, you lost me at the water bottle ramming. Sorry, but due to uncontrollable laughter I was unable to clearly read the rest from the tears in my eyes. Everytime I come on your blog I always think,,"what the heck, so many letters and not enough pix." Then I actually read what you write and you're justified. I'd rather read your thoughts than look at your mug. =) Love ya!!

Lyndzee*

Jessica Martiele said...

Okay, I laughed so hard that water came out of my nose. From my water bottle. Which made me laugh more. And oh, how I WISH you'd said that!!! Fabulous as always, MB! (By the way, we call them bobbypin skirts/shorts: so short that you need bobby pins to keep your "hair" from showing.) Love that Nathan has someone to keep him from the rotten cheese. Keep up the good work!

Paige said...

...i never want cheese again...*vomits a little*

Kim said...

LOL!!! You tell the best stories. I was on my way home from class today and this girl was walking down the street with a dress that short and I was like how does she feel comfortable in that? Some people.

The Hardy's said...

Oh my gosh! I have been cracking up from reading this! I seriously hate the skanks like that who you know dress like whores on purpose to get reactions, especially from other peoples husbands! You have the perfect words for skanks like that!